YELL'N SHOUT
3.17.23
People view relationships in different ways. Some people cannot figure out why they have such difficulty establishing long-term romantic relationships. Let’s examine the “road map” to successful relationships. When I was much younger and before all of the wonderful GPS applications became available, if we wanted to drive somewhere, we went to the Automobile Club, told them where we wanted to go, and got a
custom Triptik, a custom road map, to our destination. It’s a superb analogy for relationships.
Unfortunately, too many people are focused on what is wrong with another person. These people approach relationships, often subconsciously, as if there are permanent roadblocks to establishing a good relationship. They most often analyze a relationship in terms of its negative attributes. Most of the time these people cannot get past the normal human flaws and instead are looking for perfection. They look at the first or second page of the relationship “Triptik” and think that they can’t follow it. Most often they even lose sight of their destination because it’s so ill defined. For these people, relationships are doomed before they ever start.
The second group approaches relationships with many detours. Everything starts off well, but they continuously find detours to their goal. They have some idea of what they want in a romantic relationship, but it’s a blurry image, and it results in many insecurities. This group is much more prone to at least start good relationships. However, their roadmap too easily becomes a series of detours, of bargaining and constantly changing the destination. They haven’t taken enough time or put in enough effort to really plan out the trip carefully. The results are mostly the same as those with roadblocks, but these people get further into the “trip” before beginning to believe it’s not going to work. They get an “A” for effort, but most often don’t do really well on achievement.
My advice? Follow the Yellow Brick Road to your relationship destination. It all begins with clearly identifying what you want. Each page of your “Triptik” should be well thought through and precise. Trying to get to a destination without a well-planned route will get you lost quickly. Each page of your map is really a characteristic that is important to you in another person, and each characteristic has its place in order with the first page being most important and going from there. Researchers have identified that the most important component of a successful relationship is picking the right person. One cannot do that without a list, a Love Shopping List.
So, if you want a successful relationship, follow the Yellow Brick Road to the land of wonderment and fulfillment. Don’t be dissuaded by roadblocks or detours. Take the time to truly know what you want and
follow your own internal GPS. You are your own best mapmaker.
Tikkun Olam-heal the world. Leave it a better place when you leave.